No matter how big or small, fights with your partner are never fun. But what comes after the fight is often even worse. You start to replay the fight in your head, wondering what you could have said or done differently.
You feel guilty for what you said or did, and you worry that the fight means your relationship is doomed.
Before you do anything else, take a deep breath and read this comprehensive guide on what NOT to do after a fight with your partner.
7 Thing To Avoid Doing After a Fight With Your Partner:
1. Don’t Try To Win The Argument
It’s important to remember that not every fight needs to have a winner and a loser. In fact, trying to win an argument is often counterproductive and can make the situation worse.
Instead of trying to win, focus on understanding your partner’s perspective and finding a compromise that works for both of you.
2. Don’t Bring Up OLD Arguments
One of the worst things you can do after a fight is to bring up old arguments. Not only is this unproductive, but it can also make your partner feel like you’re not listening to them or that you don’t care about their concerns.
If you’re tempted to bring up old arguments, take a step back and ask yourself if it’s really worth digging up the past.
3. Don’t Insult Your Partner
Insults will only make the situation worse and will likely hurt your partner’s feelings. If you’re feeling angry or frustrated, it’s important to find a constructive way to express yourself.
4. Don’t Use Ultimatums
It’s tempting to use ultimatums after a fight, especially if you’re feeling hurt or angry. But ultimatums almost always make things worse.
Ultimatums are a form of blackmail, and they put your partner in a position where they feel like they have to choose between you and something else that’s important to them.
Ultimatums also tend to backfire, because they make your partner feel disrespected and resentful. If you want to resolve the fight, don’t use ultimatums.
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5. Don’t Withdraw From Your Partner
Withdrawing from your partner is the opposite of what you should be doing after a fight. This will only make the situation worse and can create an even bigger rift between you and your partner.
Instead of withdrawing, try to engage with your partner and find a way to resolve the conflict.
6. Don’t Make Excuses For Why You Fought
Making excuses for why you fought will only make your partner feel like you’re not taking responsibility for your actions.
This will make it harder to resolve the disagreement.
7. Don’t Invalidate Their NEED For Space
If your partner needs some time to cool off, don’t try to force them to talk to you. This will only make them feel like you’re not respecting their needs.
So What If I Have A New Fight With My Partner?
It’s important to take some time to cool down after a fight with your partner.
If you need to, take a walk, go for a drive, or even sleep on it. Once you’re both calm, talk things out and try to come to a resolution.
Don’t bring up past arguments, and avoid making future threats.
Lastly, apologize and mean it. Then, move on and try to make things better.
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